I’ve always been one to march to the beat of my own drum. In my teens I alternated between emo, goth, and Lolita seemingly on a weekly basis. It got my first tattoo at 16, which almost caused my parents to go into meltdown. It was worth it though, for that additional step of individuality.
Due to my parent’s vigilance, it wasn’t until after I moved out at 18 that I was able to get my second tattoo. After that I was hooked and I never went more than a few months between sessions in my favorite artist’s chair. Luckily, I worked in an environment that rewarded individuality rather than stifled it. In fact, my patrons at the bar seemed to tip more the greater portion of my skin was covered in ink. As such, by the time I was thirty I was almost completely covered in tattoos. About the only open spots were my breasts and my face. The former, because I was considering alchemically augmenting them and wanted to wait until I knew how much canvas I had to work with. And that latter, because it was still nice to disguise myself as a normie in long sleeves and pants if I ever wanted to go somewhere in “civilized” society.
One day at work, my boss and I were watching the new transformed soccer league during a slow point in the bar. My boss asked, given my body mod fixation, if I’d ever considered getting transformed as well. Up to that point, I hadn’t, but it was an intriguing notion. It certainly fit with my counterculture streak. The problem was that trying to decide what to change about myself.
Ever the gambler, my boss offered me a bet. If my team won the ongoing tournament, he would give me a 10% raise this year. If they lost, then my transformation would be worked into a promotion at the pub. Suspicious, I asked what kind of promotion? He replied that buyers of the house special would also receive a raffle ticket where they could write a suggested transformation. At the end of month, they would draw a winner.
I was skeptical and wanted to make sure I didn’t end up a boob-slug or something else unable to work, so my boss agreed that there would be three draws and I could pick among them. He did promise that if the choices were all abysmal, they could fake a redraw until I got something palatable.
I told my boss I would think about and the rest of the shift went without issue. When I got home, I couldn’t help but go online and look at all kinds of transformations. I masturbated myself to sleep looking at all the options. The next morning, I told my boss I would do it.
Unfortunately, the best player on my team suffered an injury in the next match and they eventually lost the series. With equal parts excitement and dread, it was time to start the promotion. Unfortunately, both my boss and I underestimated exactly how popular socializing my upcoming change would be. We did record sales that month and ended up with well over two hundred tickets in the raffle bowl. The interest was so high we were forced to schedule a live drawing with the highest paying patron in attendance. That ripped a hole in my safety net of jettisoning unpalatable choices.
The night of the drawing arrived and the bar was packed to standing room only. I got up on stage and pulled three slips of paper from the bowl. One by one, I read the options aloud.
First slip, horse dick merge. That was a hard pass. I was never fond of animals; nor did I feel like become a helpless appendage for the rest of my days. Next slip, boob tree merge. Still not ideal, see my feeling about being a helpless appendage above. Fingers crossed for something better, I unfolded the last slip.
Freyan anuswoman. I searched through my memory until I conjured up what an anuswoman looked like. It wouldn’t have been my first choice, but I would be mobile and able. The more I thought about it, becoming the fetishization of the dirty part of human anatomy made my nipples harden. Ironic, seeing as if I went through with the change, I wouldn’t have nipples anymore. Holding the last slip of paper high, I announced that we had a winner.
The next month, I was on a work funded trip to the Realm to undergo my change. I took a couple extra days to enjoy the local culture (i.e., have lots and lots of sex for the last time as a normal human) before I went into the machine. I then followed this up with several more days of sex as I explored the limits of my new body.
Back at work, I seemed to be even more popular than ever. My tips have at least doubled, especially when I drop a huge load of the new house special on a customer’s plate. My boss keeps talking about double or nothing with the upcoming baseball season, which scares me as I know the counterculture part of my brain is going to say yes. At this point the odd of me making it to retirement without becoming a sentient pile of genitals is becoming slimmer and slimmer. But hey, you only have one life to live, so you might as well make the most of it.