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Ok so it has been a while but im adding more chapters to my CYOC story 'Asylum 137'
4 chapters are added so far (and some short for setup purposes) but im hoping to get a good 20-30 up this week ive spent too long building it to leave it as it was.

hope you people like it

ScarletteFreize

Much obliged, as i said im interested to see the lengths that this can go.
if nothing else, ill keep separate threads going so the story expands

ive got a massive pile of notes for the story, the main difficulty is putting them into the chapter form, the most recent i spent about an hour trying to figure out the layout for the chapter before writing it.

ScarletteFreize

Asylum 137 fits into the category of story I like to call "Through everything at the wall and see what sticks" I like this structure because it allows for a lot of transformations inside of a small space.

CYOAs are circular by nature. You finish a thread only to backtrack to an earlier branch. A branch were the characters and consequences are different. I rant on and on about "muh continuity" all night, but I understand that your story is still young and it's a great idea to take ideas from multiple sources.

I can't wait for this story to grow large and then be trimmed down, like how a gardener trims a hedge, for a cleaner reading experience. Now, whether that be in the form of a Text-Adventure or a single, linear story makes no difference to me. So, keep writing, keep adding. I see the potential for the universe you created to be something big.

Big, that is, in this small, niche community of the internet. *sigh*

Thanks for the feedback , it kind of makes me blush to hear such positivity.

i agree, that is why there is initially a lot of branching. if you look at the origional story posted here it did feature the duo returning to the club but it hard to bring that in immediately when there are so many branches to take at an early stage.

im not much of an artist, but ive been working on sketch ups of the 6 main characters i had written down.
but rest assured there will be plenty more of Scarlette Skye Freeze Missy and two others who will be joining in on a few threads (and depending how the story structure goes, they will appear in threads where they hadnt been normally introduced.
The catch with a text based adventure is it can get repititious in nature. So if i was to green light it, it would be after the story at CYOC grew more, but i have been very pleased by the input and additions added.

EDIT: With the feedback in mind ive added a break to the night in the chapter 'The tables have turned' With the style of writing i used for this chapter it gives a nice segway to continuing the story outside of the first night.

ScarletteFreize

Wow! I'm really impressed. 

This fits my niche completely. Transformation via experimentation. Transformations taking precedence over sex. Surreal transformations without having to rely on the taboo of sex organs. (My primary beef with this website) Seriously, that laser-tag branch was top notch.

I've already done some of my own additions and plan to add some more in the future.

I think Asylum 137 would be perform its best as a Text-Adventure game. A circular story with branching choices and random events. Scarlette and Skye have to leave Asylum because the party has to stop eventually, but Scarlette returns at a later date with Skye, by herself, or with a third party. Expanding the possibilities beyond the scope of a simple CYOA. As well as avoiding the most worth aspect of CYOA's: the utter and absolute lack of continuity between story branches.

I would gladly take on the project myself. All I need is the green light of the OP.

That and even the most cursory understanding of coding.

That is true, the thing I hate most is when someone makes an addition and its only a setup. They expect someone else to write their story for them.

Ill be happy to keep expanding it when I'm struck with inspiration.

Yeah that's my username, the idea I'm running with is to make an open a story as possible. One of the drawbacks to Cyoc is a lot of the interactive die off- but with this I'd like to keep more flowing content.

Are you useing the name ScaetteFreize on CYOC?
I'm always checking that site for new material and I've been enjoying the new pieces recently added. Had a few ideas of my own I plan to contribute

I'd really like to coordinate with you on a few of these to keep a good chain running on it.

I use the same name on CYOC as I do here: Checkmate

all good, it is what it is. just moving forward

I' m sorry about your personal problems. :-(

But welcome back in the community!